POEM: “Family | Connections” — I sever connections where there is no meet


Family | Connections

I sever connections where there is no meet*
but grating bones, bare and scraping
zero substance, fear and weak beliefs
and an inability to stand up to/for me.

When I crashed my car he wrote to me:
“So it was your fault then?” Precisely.
Blaming another is not what I needed.
I prefer blunt, bold, stark honesty.

I saw off family appendages for their inutility (or them, me)
I do not keep blood relatives just because they are family.
I demand respect, intelligence and that you get me
Or you can fuck off with your judgment and tenuous links.

I am as intense as I am fierce for real
I will scare you with the amount I feel
I would rather be single than compromise my zeal
For a fuck-nut scared of my desire — or appeal.

(You’re smiling knowingly, you men that know/loved me:
That I’m not all this tough as I rant and appear to seem
For the one who said he was scared by my sexuality
Found me to be a kitten to hold, he was the strong to my weak

And you like that I fuck off fuckers like your mother
That I shrink into my girlness when I’m learning from your father
That despite my not wanting kids, your nieces/nephews seek me
That I reel appreciative, grateful into your loving family…)

© Sylvie Hill 2018

* absence, void, abandon, neglect, disregard, visitless, ignored.