Sylvie Hill

ALL MY LIFE

Nothing gold can stay
But a diamond lasts forever?
We’re diamonds, sort of.
Made of materials from shooting stars that exploded in a galaxy afar.
Spun about to make our Earth
And now we have a place to hang.
Nothing gold can stay
But a diamond lasts forever is the cliché
They use that to sell life-long marriages and vows and babies in baby carriages.
And here I am, trying to cheat the system.
Figure I’ll wait until ‘the rest of our lives’ doesn’t seem like such a long sentence.
So that ‘the rest of our lives’ feels a bit desperate.
Maybe I’ll be forced to commit to some guy that is somewhat of a sort of interest.
Speaking of interesting do you remember the time the stars were shooting out of the sky?
I was showering after love-making
Oh how you loved, I was in the tub and you blasted in with a beer in one hand
A smoke dangling from your mouth,
“You gotta come see this! The Light! The light!”
And after all these years I have the balls to say you were the boring one.
“Yeah, give me a drag, k, I might. I might…”
Never did. Went to bed.
Nothing gold can stay
But diamonds last forever.
I clearly fucked with precious gems. Never knowing their value.
For all the men who loved me longtime, lots, and all my tortures…
The ring he made, a band of braille, it read a message all in dots.
A clever morse-code piece of uniqueness, crafted with all his love.
It wasn’t good enough.
Our golden hour, that disappointing response in the shower
Has long since vanished but he shines on regardless.
I’m silver. I tarnish.
The soft touch polishes, and I may shine.
But how often I feel like I’m nothing more than made of copper or of dime.
Because if I was golden, I’d feel pressured to stay bright, and light,
And a diamond ring on my finger petrifies.
I’ve never loved steady for more than two years at a time
But felt longing for some all my life…

©Sylvie Hill 2013